{"id":84,"date":"2007-01-26T00:31:51","date_gmt":"2007-01-26T00:31:51","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/silverjacket.com\/blog\/uncategorized\/step_3_dont_ope\/"},"modified":"2007-01-26T00:31:51","modified_gmt":"2007-01-26T00:31:51","slug":"step_3_dont_ope","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/silverjacket.com\/blog\/technology\/step_3_dont_ope\/","title":{"rendered":"Step 3: Don’t open the box."},"content":{"rendered":"

\"Schrodingers_cat\"<\/a>Usually my coworkers and I are too busy at the office to use IM for anything non-work-related, but occasionally it serves as a virtual water cooler, like yesterday.<\/p>\n

matt: how was your date<\/span>
matt: is that why you were late<\/span>
jay: no, i had a doctor's appointment this morning.<\/span>
matt: was the doc appt related to the date?<\/span>
jay: i wish.<\/span>
carlin: there's a male morning after pill now?<\/span>
matt: it seeks out and destroys your sperm wherever it happens to be<\/span>
carlin: it's a homing and killing device.<\/span>
jay: yeah. the guy takes the pill, the woman's pregnancy terminates.<\/span>
jay: does your sperm have to be pre-installed with self-destruct devices?<\/span>
matt: no the spewed sperm are quantum-entangled with your remaining sperm. it reads those.<\/span>
carlin: bingo<\/span>
jay: "quantum entangled" – i'm not familiar with that term.<\/span>
matt: simple physics. <\/span>
jay: <\/span>yeah, sounds real simple<\/span>
matt: <\/span>collapse of the wave function, etc.<\/span>
carlin: it's a sperm, it's a particle…<\/span>
matt: it's a spermicle<\/span>
matt: we should do a charticle on spermicles<\/span>
jay: and how does it work? the man swallows a pill?<\/span>
carlin: it's a spermcicle<\/span>
carlin: yum<\/span>
jay: or he goes to the window and releases it?<\/span>
matt: he jacks off into a black box<\/span>
matt: with a cat<\/a> in it<\/span><\/p>\n

EPILOGUE <\/span><\/p>\n

Jay laughs so loudly at this that another coworker asks Jay to share with the group.
jay: what should i say?<\/span>
matt: MAKE SOMETHING UP<\/span>
jay: give me something!<\/span>
Carlin distracts the coworker with a question about the flowers on her desk.
carlin: drop it<\/span>
matt: um, tell her you found a picture of a monkey that looks like a dog<\/span>
jay: should i seriously forward that<\/a><\/span> to her?<\/span>
carlin: no drop it!!!!<\/span>
matt: looks like she's over it<\/span>
jay: ok. thanks. nice work, carlin.<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Usually my coworkers and I are too busy at the office to use IM for anything non-work-related, but occasionally it serves as a virtual water cooler, like yesterday. matt: how was your datematt: is that why you were latejay: no, i had a doctor's appointment this morning.matt: was the doc appt related to the date?jay: […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[40,39,14],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-84","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-science","category-sex","category-technology"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/silverjacket.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/84","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/silverjacket.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/silverjacket.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/silverjacket.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/silverjacket.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=84"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/silverjacket.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/84\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/silverjacket.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=84"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/silverjacket.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=84"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/silverjacket.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=84"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}