Not Off the Presses

For each of the three press releases below, all put out today, guess which summary was provided by EurekAlert and which was not.

Saliva clue to chronic bullying

A) Saliva in children's hair may be a biological indicator of the trauma kids undergo when they are chronically bullied by peers, according to researchers who say permanent markers can also aid in the early creation of long-term psychological effects on youth.

B) Hormones in children's saliva may be a biological indicator of the trauma kids undergo when they are chronically bullied by peers, according to researchers who say biological markers can aid in the early recognition and intervention of long-term psychological effects on youth.

Walk like an Egyptian — or a Roman — experience what the past really looked like

A) Computer scientists and cultural heritage researchers are assessing whether today's increasingly sophisticated 3-D computer technology can be combined with the most recent historical evidence to produce significantly improved visual reconstructions of churches, palaces and other ancient sites.

B) Did you miss the 80's, or do you not have VH-1? Computer scientists and cultural heritage researchers are assessing whether today's increasingly sophisticated 3-D computer technology can be combined with the most recent historical evidence to produce significantly improved visual reconstructions of the Bangles, the Pizza! Pizza! guy, and other ancient artifacts.

Spud origin controversy solved

A) For years, researchers have debated the birthplace of the European potato. Recent genetic studies revealed that the earliest known landraces of the European potato contain both Andean and Chilean molecular markers. These findings may change current breeding programs which focus solely on the Andean landraces and not the Chilean landraces, according to scientists at the University of Wisconsin.

B) For years, researchers have debated the source of the potato projectile that cracked the spectacles of Jenny Connolly in second grade. Recent genetic studies revealed that the earliest known traces of the potato residue contain both Andean and Chilean molecular markers. These findings may change current investigations which focus solely on "one spud gun theory", according to scientists at the University of Wisconsin.

Answers: If you said the actual summaries are B, A, A, why did you play along this is dumb.