Why do we buy furniture? To have sex on, right? Right. Finally a furniture seller has faced up to reality and offered a web interface that lets you animate people having sex on their wares. This is shopper-centric merchandising without the BS.
Tok&Stok, Brazil’s answer to Crate&Barrel, provides for your enjoyment three tables, three couches, a beanbag chair, and what look to be two dog beds(!). Fun for the whole family…
Under the description of each item, there are five "Suggestions of use." You’ve got your doggy style, your 69, your reverse cowgirl, and a few other standards (and exotics) I don’t recall the names of. (The muscle memory is strong though.) Take your pick and watch Moby and Sinead O’Connor rub naughty bits right there. In case they didn’t include your favorite Kama Sutra position, there’s a SuperSpecialBonusFeature that I just LURVE. Click on "my own style" and play with 27 variables, creating the most bizarro antigravity freakazoid borderline-non-Euclidean mf lovemonkeyness you can fathom. (You cannot, however, toggle off the damn floating hearts.)
Presumably they created their Valentines Book of Styles after receiving too much icky returned merchandise or witnessing too many unmentionable incidents on floor demos. "Try before you buy"? Not so much. "Um, yeah, Union of the Tiger isn’t compatible with these arm rests. Oh, sorry if the cushions are stuck together."
update:
My friend Jack–who is a chaplain and a grandfather–looked at the site and wrote: "I enjoyed the furniture thing but thought it was not very diverse. In Massachusetts we would hope the narrowness of heterosexuality would not be celebrated."
Indeed. At Brown we would have called it heteronormative. At Brown that’s about the worst insult there is.
Leave a Reply to Anonymous Cancel reply